Well, Hello There

I have fallen off the optimistic wagon. But I still have a tiny shred of hope.

Weight Watchers has rolled out their newest plan, Freestyle – FLEX for the UK and other territories. People are losing their shit because their daily points have been seriously reduced. All for the sake of teaching people to make better choices.

AS IF!

I’m sorry, but, those who struggle with food and weight are the same as others who struggle with alcohol, drugs, smoking, gambling, and other addictions. Overeating is a behavior, just like being sedentary, which adds to the complicated weight loss equation.

When you have two negatives, it’s difficult to get a positive result – unless you’re multiplying. Wait. That’s only in mathematics.

There are positives to the new Weight Watchers plan:
•There are a shit ton of new foods on the ZERO POINTS list.
•Existing Smart Points for the non-free foods haven’t changed or increased.
•More freedom, according to Weight Watchers.

The negatives:
Less leeway for unhealthy choices. I try not to use the word bad
when it comes to anything psychological, and struggling with weight is
almost all psychological, according to a former psychologist I spoke to 12
years ago.
•There will be a lot of confusion and a considerable period of adjustment.
Understandable.

Trying to teach an old dog new tricks is mighty difficult. Those who want their sweets, will get them somehow or another. Sugar is one of the worst addictions ever. It’s right up there with illicit drugs and alcohol. It does serious damage to the body when repeatedly consumed in unhealthy quantities over time.

Just as sugar does damage to the body (acidic blood levels, diabetes, etc.), general overeating does other damage. Undoing that damage takes three or four times the effort as binging.

This is where meetings are [sometimes] helpful – depending on the leaders and the group. If either are making things worse, then it’s counterintuitive, in my opinion. I would rather pay a psychologist every other week. At least there, I have a full hour to bitch and moan about the bag of Doritos I wasn’t allowed to eat.

All in all, I’m hopeful, but scared. I’ve packed on 30 pounds more than what I originally lost in 2009. Some of it I’ll blame on hormones, since almost every female I’ve spoken to has experienced outrageous weight gain since their hysterectomy. The rest I’ll blame on myself. Yes, I’m owning up to it. I don’t play the blame game when it comes to my health.

Now, it’s just a matter of getting myself out of the funk I’ve been in since 2011. One day at a time, and baby steps. Thank God my husband is on this journey with me again. I don’t think I could do it alone. I don’t do alone. I never have.

Good luck to all in their journey!

I’m Going To Die Anyways

People kill me.

I understand the reasoning behind trying to live as clean as possible. But, it’s literally impossible to eliminate all toxins from daily living.

When you think of it, almost everything in our daily lives is toxic. Electricity is toxic. Our water is toxic, for fuck sake! Do you really think it’s safe to put fluoride into your body, via tap water? If you go by what Kevin Trudeau says, you practically need to live in a cave, away from civilization to live clean. Drink only rain water, and only if it’s thousands of miles from any major city. CHRIST! It’s absolutely ridiculous.

Avoiding GMO products and changing unhealthy habits like smoking is one thing. But telling me not to burn candles, or use anything on my skin that I can’t eat (excuse me?), or not to wear any clothing except for organic cotton borders insane.

What started out as a simple request for opinions on some nice smelling candles, has turned into eye rolling and major paranoia.

Apparently, candles are bad for you. More specifically, candles containing paraffin, and harmful chemicals, like LEAD. YIKES! Is there anything enjoyable in life that isn’t bad for you?

I refrained from getting into another heated argument with a stranger a little bit ago. It took a lot of restraint.

Is it 5 o’clock somewhere yet? Oh, wait. Alcohol is toxic to your liver…

No, I Said

I do not like
To relocate
Pain and suffering
I do equate

Heavy boxes
I hate to pack
Moving furniture
Breaks my back

It burns my wallet
Every time
Do they really think
I have a spare dime

Not to mention
It makes me edgy
Taking a toll
My nerves are sketchy

* * * * *

PS: I hate moving……….

It’s All Fun & Games

…until you grow up.

Has anyone ever thought of themselves as a juvenile adult? I’m quite childish in recent years. Especially since my parents are both deceased. Many strangers can never guess my age when I ask them. I love getting proofed for alcohol.

If you’re a teenager reading this, don’t be so quick to ‘grow up’. Certain aspects of adulting suck-a-doodle-doo. And I made that one up all on my own last year. It nearly gave my daughter an aneurysm because she laughed so hard when I said it.

By the way, I lied when I said certain aspects of adulting sucks. ALL of it sucks.

When we were young, we hated naps. Now, we can’t wait to have a nap, and we want as many as possible. In fact, I wouldn’t complain if I could sleep 24/7. But that’s unhealthy. Don’t do that.

When we were young, we wanted to be cool and have a job like our friends. NOW? As an adult you live for Fridays, and cry on Mondays.

When we were young, we couldn’t wait to drive. As adults, people we know die in car accidents. Our vision starts to fail, and we don’t get our license renewed unless that vision test is passed.

When we were young, we couldn’t wait to legally drink and smoke. As adults, we have lung disease and fried livers.

When we were young, we couldn’t wait to get married and start a family. As adults, our children give us gray hair and put us in the poor house.

When we were young, we spent our ‘hard earned’ college years side-job money carelessly. As adults, electricity and water get shut off if money is spent carelessly.

When we were young, we couldn’t wait to have a credit card. As adults, we claim bankruptcy because of them.

When we were young, we couldn’t wait to eat as much junk food as we wanted. As adults, things like heart disease and diabetes is cause for higher health insurance premiums.

Someone please answer me this: WHY did I want to grow up?

I can’t wait to turn 50 in three years. WOOHOO!