Tomorrow is the big day. Well, it’s not really anything special. Just an order is being delivered that has been long awaited. I got sick of searching local markets, and finally broke down, paying the $10 for a package of 5. But I can’t seem to post a link to a picture. So I’ll continue with sharing what few dreams I recall from last night.
The first part was about visiting my aunt and uncle in New Jersey. Their house was different …. and massive, with rooms nobody ever used. I assumed it was meant for multiple guests or catering parties. The catering parties explained why they had ten refrigerators. It was insane! And all of them had food in them. But I wasn’t allowed to touch any of it.
As we were getting ready for our trip home the next day, I was looking for a small bag of potato chips I bought for the road trip. When I looked in one particular cupboard, I noticed a package of Samyang Ramen, and promptly lost my shit, wondering where the hell my aunt got it.
“The store down the street. They always have them on sale. I use the noodles in certain recipes.” When I noticed she had dozens of 5 packs lined along the upper shelves of her kitchen cabinets………….
And then I was begging her to let me take one package home with me because I just got through spending $10 for one package of 5!!! “Of course. I’m making some right now if you want to wait a little bit. Will you help me set the table???” But I had to wash all the dishes first.
After all was said and done, I started speed packing and getting ready for dinner … and desperately looking for a bathroom because washing dishes always activates my overactive bladder.
In the middle of still searching for a bathroom, my uncle decided to make room at the table for everyone else (everyone else???) and started eating without us, directly from the saucepan, at the breakfast bar. That’s when I noticed about 20 place settings all served with noodles, fancy shrimp, salads, and other delicacies. Apparently we were having guests.
Then I was scurrying for milk because I knew the noodles were going to torch my throat and mouth. Notice I say throat first, because that’s what Samyang’s extra spicy ramen does. It kicks your throat’s ass first, then returns to your taste buds for a secondary assault. But it’s a good assault, in the name of heavenly masochistic flavor.
Anyways, I missed out on the 2x spicy noodles because I took too long looking for the damn milk, of which there was none. I didn’t understand this because there was plenty of room in all of those refrigerators! I guess I was going to live with ice water. It’s better than nothing. But that’s fine, because there was some black bean noodles leftover, and those were yummy, and not as torturous.
But then we had to go home, back to my parents’ house, where nobody was home. My parents didn’t live there though. The current owners were away, and there I was pounding on the door (which accidentally swung open) like an idiot. When a stray cat ran past me into the back of the garage, I had to save it from the construction going on inside. I felt like a trespassing criminal, wanting desperately to see what the house looked like inside. But I had to leave.
Then we were headed to the lake, where my son finally agreed to go outside and make sand castles the size of real houses. People were demanding to know where he got all the sand from, yelling at me for being a bad mom, when an F5 started forming over the lake, sucking up all of the water.
The way people were running was comical, and because I was well past my panic stage, I just started laughing. But mainly over the way people were running.
It’s a tornado, folks! Not a jellyfish. RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!
Then Kevin showed up with a freaking monster truck that he stole from a nearby dealership, and we all scrambled our way up, via the gigantic house-sized tires. My son thought it was cool, but I was about to die from a heart attack because I’m out of shape. But that didn’t keep me from whipping out my cell phone as Kevin peeled out, causing everyone to scream because they were suddenly eating sand.
The view was great, and I got all kinds of cool pictures. Until Ra showed up, and chased the tornado away. Then we were all screaming because he was pissed, and was shooting flames at all of us from every one of his orifices – including his eyes.
And that’s when I woke up with a major hot flash. Time to wash the bedding.
Just Me And My Music 